Hello all,
Something I have been struggling with lately (that I honestly hate to admit), is being single. Singleness is not a bad thing at all means, but going to a Christian college where getting your "ring before spring" is preached a lot, you can start to feel lonely and wonder why God is making you wait. Especially, when you're like me and never actually had a serious boyfriend. However, I feel God calling me to a time of singleness. Although, I am not a patient person and do not like waiting, I know God has called me to this time of singleness and I am learning to be content in it.
Here are the reasons I am taking the call to singleness:
1. You have to be fully content in one area of your life before God moves you to another.
One of the girls in my prayer group mentioned this last semester and it has really stuck with me since. I want to be able to be content with myself before I become content with being with another person. "Why?", you may ask. Well, I feel that if I cannot fully be content and love myself then I am bound to put all of my happiness into one person. That is not realistic and not healthy. I fully believe relationships become codependent when you are not content with yourself and relying on God for your self-worth.
2. College is a time to explore the opportunities around you and yourself.
I've made a commitment to not dating my freshmen year, which I mentioned in one of my earlier blogs, and I fully intend to sticking to that. I fully believe freshmen year should be about learning about who YOU are and what your passions and interests are. I wholeheartedly believe that college is about exploring yourself and honestly, since I don't know myself that well yet, I don't want to date someone who could potentially take away from me having these opportunities and time to explore. I want to be able to take the time to get to know myself and get involved before I choose to be with someone.
3. You need to take care of your own needs first.
College is a time where a lot is going on, college is where many start to have mental illnesses and stress is taking a toll on everyone no matter how much you don't procrastinate or how organized you are. I am a full believer that two people in a relationship should be healthy and able to take care of their own problems. I'm not saying you can't rely on each other for support, but you need to be able to be strong and take care of yourself. When two people start dating and rely on each other for support you can either damage each others accomplishments because it's hard seeing your boyfriend or girlfriend sad, or there becomes so much negativity in the relationship that you two may break up. You need to be able to take care of yourself and have people around you who support you, and most importantly lean on the Lord in all of your struggles.
4. There is a time for everything.
Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, "There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens." Right now, God is calling me to a time of singleness for all of these reasons above and more. Right now I am nowhere near emotionally or spiritually mature to be in a relationship and I am completely okay with that. I want to focus on falling more and more in love with the Lord through my daily Bible reading and worship before I commit to someone else. It honestly is hard sometimes to see so many of my friends getting into relationships, but then I remember that God has a plan for everything. One day I am going to be able to look back on all of my regrets, mistakes, sacredness, etc. and say that it's all worth it when I'm looking into the eyes of the one that is my boyfriend and I intend to marry. Until then, singleness it is.
Love always,
Anna Nokes
No comments:
Post a Comment